Review: 'The Boy’s Own Manual to Being a Proper Jew'

My review of Eli Glasman's The Boy’s Own Manual to Being a Proper Jew is over at Kill Your Darlings today 

Interview with Eli Glasman, author of ‘The Boy’s Own Manual To Being a Proper Jew’

I actually read Eli Glasman’s ‘The Boy’s Own Manual To Being a ProperJew’ a few months back, when the publisher kindly sent me a review copy. I fell in love with the book after one chapter, and by the last page I’d decided I simply *had* to talk to the author of this gutsy coming-of-age novel. 

 ‘The Boy’s Own Manual’ also got me thinking about LGBTQI books in Australian youth literature (or, the lack thereof) and was partly the inspiration for my writing an article about this for the upcoming 19^th edition of Kill YourDarlings. I interviewed Glasman for that piece, and will be sure to post links when Issue #19 is released next month! 

 But until then, here he is – the author who will no doubt be appearing on any number of Australian literary shortlists in the coming months – Eli Glasman!

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Q: How were you first published – agent or slush pile?

Slush pile, I guess. My third short story was published in Sleepers Almanac, which is the annual literary magazine that Sleepers Publishing run. So, I’d worked with Louise before and she knew my writing.

I wanted to work with someone whom I’d worked with before. And I greatly respected the novels that Sleepers Publishing released. So, I sent it through to them. She got back to me very, very quickly. Which was great.

Q: Are you a ‘plotter’ or a ‘pantser’ - that is, do you meticulously plot your novel before writing, or do you ‘fly by the seat of your pants’ and let the story evolve naturally?

Both. I’m fairly structured with the plot and fluid with the prose. On a syntax level, I find it produces stilted prose to be too structured. I make sure to let myself go entirely, allowing for every idea, line of dialogue, point of description to come onto the page without filter. Then I’ll edit the prose appropriately.

However, if I do this without a direction, the prose will meander and I’ll actually find myself focusing on the plot, rather than the sentences themselves. And the prose become forced, repetitive and solely functional. Rather than having the sense of fun and warmth I try to achieve.

Another element is that once the characters are ‘alive’ and I know them well enough much of the prose snowball based on their wants and needs. For instance, with this novel, I knew that I wanted certain elements based on something I’d planned – such as, say, a point in the character’s development, but I needed to allow the character to reach that point organically.

So, if I wrote an exchange of dialogue I think worked and Yossi was feeling angry by the end of it, I needed to ensure he remained feeling angry for a realistic amount of time. And if/when he calmed down it needed to happen naturally, say because of something someone said, or simply because of the passing of time. This approach avoided drastic chops and changes in the character’s emotional state.

So, the novel unfolded organically in that sense, however I still had a solid idea of where I wanted the characters to go. And even if I forgot about what I’d planned as I was writing, the characters would often end up there on their own, so to speak.

 

Q: How long did it take you to write ‘The Boy’s Own Manual to Being a Proper Jew’, from first idea to final manuscript?

It took me seven months. I can’t take too long to write a novel. The writing kind of takes over my life for a while and I need to get it all down while it’s still fresh. It’s not that I lose ideas, it’s that I lose emotional connections I’ve made with the potential of what the novel can be. I like to write with that thrill.

Q: Where do story ideas generally start for you? Do you first think of the character, theme, ending? Or is it just a free-fall?

Free for all, I guess. I work in periods of obsessions, which can go on for years. I have certain themes, ideas and character types, which I will explore in every angle I can through a series of works – be it short stories, novels and recently, blog entries – until I feel I no longer have anything to say about it.

I’ve been writing since I was a kid, however I only focused seriously on getting published a few years ago. So, for me, the work that is getting published now is a continuation of the work I’d been doing for a very long time. So, it’s difficult to pinpoint how a story emerges. I’ve had several in mind for a number of years, which will one day reach the page. But right now, they’re a jumble of ideas, themes, characters and even descriptions and lines of dialogue. A large part of the initial stages in the writing process is just about clearing all that up so it makes sense.

 

Q: Were you drawing a lot on your own experiences with regards to Yossi’s religious devotion and teachings? His school life was so fascinating, and meticulously explored.

I was, most definitely. I love drawing on memory when I can and I certainly enjoyed thinking back to my school life. I would devote evenings to simply remembering things.

In one of my blog posts, I talked about how I stopped believing in God and living the religious lifestyle, yet that I still miss believing in God. It’s just, for me, being an atheist isn’t a choice.

So, it was nice to be able to exercise some old beliefs, which I am no longer able to experience. That was one of the major enjoyments of writing this novel for me.

Q: What’s the appeal in writing for young adults?

The intimacy of the genre. I love the intensity and honesty of teenage relationships.

Q: What are you working on right now, and when can we expect it to hit shelves!?

I’m writing a novel about a young man with Crohn’s Disease who is trying to deepen his relationship with his mother, who suffers from bipolar. The novel explores the manner in which each of their illnesses isolate one from the other.

I wish I knew when it’ll hit the shelves! I try not to think too far ahead when I’m writing, or I get anxious about it. But hopefully not too long.

 

Q: Do you have any recent great reads to recommend?

Holy Bible, by Vanessa Russell, and What Was Left, by Eleanor Limprecht and Inheritance, by Balli Kaur Jaswal. And not just because they’re Sleepers novels, it’s because they’re awesome.

Q: Do you have any advice for budding young writers?

Focus on learning the craft.

A publishing house is a company that produces books. They can do a number things in house and for other things they outsource. The writing of the books themselves, is something that they outsource. If you wish to be the one they outsource to, you will need to be able to do something they can’t do in house – namely write fiction. So make sure you understand this craft through and through. You are hoping to present yourself as a freelancer, an expert. So become an expert.

If any of the elements of writing fiction, such as character development, plot structure, dialogue, syntax are things you don’t understand, learn about them through writing and reading and talking to others about the craft. You don’t want to be learning on the job once you start to get published. Because if you do bad work and it does get published, it will be by your name forever.

This time right now, before you get published, is extremely important. It is the only time you will truly have to learn this craft without any expectations placed on by others.

And secondly, share your work! Language is a tool of communication. It was never mean to sit inside our heads and fester. Gauge how others respond to your writing. It is one of the best ways to learn the craft. Get used to getting criticism. If you’re in this for the long haul, you're going to have to get used to putting your work out there eventually. So, start now.

'The Boy’s Own Manual To Being a Proper Jew' is published by Sleepers Publishing, and available in all good bookshops from July 1

‘The Boy's Own Manual to Being a Proper Jew’ by Eli Glasman

Received from the Publisher 

From the BLURB:

Yossi, at seventeen, feels as though his homosexuality makes him less of a Jew. Living as he does in Melbourne’s Orthodox Jewish community, he has a lot to hide. When non-religious rebel Josh turns up at school, Yossi is asked to look after him, and while Yossi educates Josh on the ancient traditions of their race, Josh does some educating of his own. Through their relationship, Yossi learns to see the laws of Judaism in a very new light.

But when he and Josh are caught kissing in the bathhouse, Yossi’s life takes on a dramatic new turn, and he can ignore his new reality no longer.

The Boy’s Own Manual to Being a Proper Jew is full of heart and human blundering, as a family gradually learns to accept the parameters of its faith, and how to work around them.

For lovers of Melbourne, drama, and romance, and for anyone who remembers teenage or thwarted love, this is a page-turner.

Yossi is seventeen-years-old and lives in Melbourne’s biggest Jewish suburb of Caulfield. He attends Beth Dovid high school and is among their most spiritual and dedicated students. His mother died of bowel cancer when he was very young, and now there’s just Yossi, his father and older sister, Talya – a close family, and Yossi is especially preoccupied with making his father proud of him.

Yossi is also gay, and would give just about anything not to be.

When a new student arrives at Beth Dovid – blonde haired, blue-eyed Josh Davies – Yossi is tasked with showing him around campus and familiarising him with the school’s traditions. But Josh has his own troubles at home, and isn’t particularly interested in the spiritual side of education, and can’t fathom why Yossi is so preoccupied with it.

Little does Yossi know that meeting Josh will push him into examining his homosexuality and figuring out where it fits into his faith.

‘The Boy's Own Manual to Being a Proper Jew’ is the debut young adult novel by Australian author Eli Glasman, and the first YA title from independent Sleepers Publishing.

It’s been a topic of discussion in the YA world for a while now that the way gay characters are being written is changing for the better. Mainly because ‘coming out’ stories aren’t so prevalent, and more and more we’re actually reading gay characters for whom being gay is not the most interesting thing about them – it’s just who they are. Take American author Tim Federle’s ‘Better Nate Than Ever’, for example, the book was given an ‘extreme caution’ (really?) label because "homosexuality is presented as normal and natural in this book” – which rather flattered Federle. In Will Kostakis’s 'The First Third' the protagonist’s best friend Lucas is gay, and has cerebral palsy – and Kostakis recently wrote a fantastic blog on why it’s a bit saddening when readers tell him they like Lucas because he’s not “over-the-top” gay.

The reason it’s so great to read books in which characters being gay is not a focus is because it’s feeding into the very reason why diversity (whether it be sexual, racial, disability etc) is so important – to create familiarity, normality and empathy. But just because there’s a change for the better, please don’t think that is synonymous with ‘enough’ – because there’s still a serious lack of diversity in YA, as has been a hot topic of discussion particularly in 2014.

This all leads me to Eli Glasman’s debut YA novel, ‘The Boy's Own Manual to Being a Proper Jew’. Yes, it’s a coming out story but one that desperately needed to be told on two counts – one because it’s an Australian YA coming-out story, and two because it’s a coming-out story about a young man questioning his homosexuality alongside his Jewish faith.

Aussie YA deserves credit for many things, but like all other youth literature communities we don’t do diversity terribly well (yet!)– particularly when it comes to writing lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, questioning, and intersex (LGBTQI) characters. And while it might seem like an obvious place for questions of subversion to spring from – young adult stories centred around homosexuality and faith are also fairly few and far between. Enter Eli Glasman’s ‘The Boy's Own Manual to Being a Proper Jew’ – one of the best YA novels I’ve read in 2014, and if it wasn’t on your radar before, then I predict it will be in the coming months when it no doubt appears on a slew of Awards shortlists (watch this space!).

Yossi is a young man full of faith, who takes his spiritual education very seriously. He lives in a mostly Jewish suburb of Melbourne, and his father is likewise a very devout man.

I’d lived in this house my entire life. I belonged here. My place was amongst Jews, keeping alive traditions that were centuries old. I couldn’t imagine a life where each day bled into the next with nothing more to punctuate existence but payday and a piss up on the weekend. A life with no God, no holy days, no prayers, no significance to food or clothing.

It’s no wonder then, that when Yossi can no longer deny his homosexuality he has to start soul-searching and trying to figure out where his faith and sexuality intersect. Even if that means questioning his religion, and thinking critically about the very rules that guide all aspects of his life;

‘So, yeah,’ I went on. ‘I’m gay. But I was also born a Jew. Neither being gay nor being religious are choices for me. I’ve been both for my whole life.’

I loved this book on all fronts. I loved that it’s set in Melbourne and the little details that Glasman writes to sharpen the Caulfield setting are wonderful – like Yossi’s family being part of the Lubavitch sect, their synagogue an exact replica of leader Lubavitcher Rebbe’s synagogue in New York. And I especially loved Glasman writing about Judaism, letting readers into this world that many won’t be familiar with. He doesn’t write Yossi’s life like a theology lesson, but rather lets readers in on the less familiar terms and traditions, like – a tzitzit is a traditional woollen undergarment, and you’re not allowed to sit on the same level as a siddur, a prayer book – in such a way that is both respectful and fascinating. Glasman is also able to write easy insight via the character of Josh, who is less preoccupied with spiritual traditions, and needs Yossi to explain things like kashering dishes – purifying them (and if non-kosher food touches them, you have to re-purify them).

I particularly enjoyed reading the rigors and rituals because it was Glasman establishing just what Yossi is up against in grappling with his homosexuality;

I knew that there was only sin in acting on my impulses, not simply in being the way I was. And yet, just having these terrible feelings made me feel like less of a Jew.
 

And this is the other reason I loved the book. Eli Glasman says on his website that he’s not gay, but someone very close to him has been through the struggles of ‘coming out’. I think I knew this, even before clarifying via Glasman’s FAQ page – because he writes Yossi’s first-person story with such tenderness and patience, beautifully portraying his grappling between religion and faith, personal enlightenment versus religious doctrine;

‘When you’re gay, your sex life is on trial. All of a sudden you are being judged for what you do in the bedroom. But Judaism sees sex as a private thing between the two people involved, and God.’

Glasman really highlighted a parallel for me too, between Yossi’s accepting his homosexuality alongside his faith, and his becoming a young adult who thinks critically and independently instead of letting school, religion and family do the thinking for him.

I also loved the character of Josh, whose presence in Yossi’s life is really part of the impetus for his questioning everything around him. I do love a rebellious teen, and Josh was a great shake-up for Yossi who I enjoyed reading for his own complicated back-story too:

‘Bloody hell,’ Josh whispered heatedly. ‘You can’t let a book tell you how you’re allowed to have sex.’

Eli Glasman is a daring new author who is much needed in Australia’s youth literature scene, and ‘The Boy's Own Manual to Being a Proper Jew’ should be on everyone’s must-read list. Here is a gutsy coming-of-age story that tackles internal and external battles of faith and sexuality with infinite tenderness and witty aplomb. Trust me when I say you should meet Yossi, and keep an eye on Eli Glasman.

5/5